I Don't Get It

So it's time to address the World Cup. First let me tell you that I'm not a soccer guy. I love the NFL, i follow hockey ( Go Blackhawks ) , some basketball, even golf and an occasional NASCAR event, but soccer i don't get. Apparently this puts me in the minority, once again, of things that are popular. Frankly i don't give a shit, however i am trying. I've been following the games on ESPN and the web and even attempted to watch a game. Trying to watch a game was brutal. First if you don't get it you have to depend on the announcers to explain things. What a fricken joke, one guy was British, hard to understand, they don't speak American. The other guy was a Scotsman, wow. Have you ever heard Robin Williams talk about how golf was invented ? well that's this guy . could not understand a word. " ahhhh thouou midfifier blabla strike bla bla bla foot bla bla goallllllllllllllllllllll . WTF just happened ? The other thing that makes it hard to follow is the 5 hundred pound bumble bee that seems to be at every game. WTF, all you can here is that big son of bitch buzzing.... I have picked up on one or two things. First the rs this thing called a yellow card, apparently if you play too hard, or celebrate you get one. One guy scored a goal and took off his shirt and ran around . He got a yellow card. I guess that's not bad, the last time I removed an article of clothing and ran around I got arrested. I would have preferred a yellow card. I saw that FIFA is busting a bunch of babes in orange mini skirts. Apparently it was set up by some small dutch beer company and Budweiser (official sponsor ) was pissed. I think FIFA should get a yellow card for that one. The babes were fun to watch. The other thing I've picked up on is these fans do know how to party. it was reported that after the South African teams first game that condom sales in Johannesburg increased 5 times. Party on.... Oh yeah the S. African team lost yesterday so now they must beat the French, so who hasn't. The big upset was Spain loosing to the Swiss. I guess this was pretty embarrassing. The Spanish team did announce a line up change,apparently Francisco Franco will now be playing middle fielder for Spain. If any of you care game 7 of the NBA finals is tonight. Bye for now ,i have to go watch the US Open.